When we silence ourselves, we pay dearly!

Let's talk about the price we pay, when we silence ourselves. It relates very much to an earlier article of mine, discussing the pain of becoming visible. Especially when we tend to be on the introverted side, it can be hard.

Sharing our own opinion, our message as a business, or our latest art is a vulnerable thing to do, because it requires us to show up!

When we create publicly, be it in form of a painting, a piece of writing, acting, a short film, we express a specific, precious part of ourselves. Similarly, having our own small business, posting our insights online or announcing ‘ Listen, this is what I have to offer. Would that be interesting to you?’ that's scary too. There’s nowhere to hide, is there.

Although quite a few people prefer to market their business in a very inauthentic, kind of manipulative way. But that’s not what I am talking about. If you happen to be authentic with the things you do and share, you put yourself on the line. It’s a risky business and for the more shy people amongst us, it takes a lot of courage to do so.

Of course it makes sense to look at the risk involved and consider things, which will make it easier. Simultaneously though, we need to look at what it costs us to stay silent, when we actually have something to say, which matters.

Personally I believe, that silencing ourselves is a form of protection, a safety measure so to speak. Maybe we have been ridiculed as a child, when we showed up as our own quirky self or there might have been bullying involved.

Certainly there are many reasons, which cause someone to prefer staying silent!

Very valid ones, too. I think it is very important to acknowledge the need to stay safe and to give love to our parts, being too afraid to speak up.

It's like as if we put on an invisibility cloak to keep us out of harm’s way.

On top of all of this, there’s the undeniable reality of toxic environments, where it actually at times makes a lot of sense to stay silent. Which makes the whole subject even more complex, because we are asked to apply discernment to where we chose to show up fully and where it is too dangerous for us to do so.

We might need to tell ourselves something like this:

‘Yes, it makes sense to keep certain things to myself that are too vulnerable in manipulative environments. But for my own sanity and for my own well being, I need to create supportive spaces where I can express myself. Where I can show up with my gifts and what I've got to share with the world.’

The danger of constantly silencing ourselves, because we feel there’s literally no space for us to express ourselves, is that we not only become more and more invisible on the outside, but we also start to become invisible to ourselves.

We don’t know anymore who we are, what makes us special. It’s a loss of voice, feeling we haven’t got anything interesting to say anyways. Though, there’s a lot of insightful wisdom within us tugged away safely.

Thinking and being this way can affect our mental health, which I know from my own experience. There have been times when I've felt suffocated by not speaking my truth, because I felt so paralysed by my fear of being seen. And yet, I've also discovered that allowing myself to be seen, to express myself fully, has been liberating. It's helped me reclaim my identity, reconnect with my passions, and find a sense of purpose and belonging.

Of course, finding the courage to step out of the shadows is easier said than done and sometimes we need help to do so.

That's why I'm excited to announce the development of a new group program designed to support those of you who struggle with visibility. Whether you're an entrepreneur hesitant to share your business ideas or an artist reluctant to showcase your work, this program is for you. Together, we'll explore playfully the barriers holding you back, cultivate confidence, and empower you to step into the spotlight with courage and authenticity. I will share more details very soon.

So, you’re invited to join me on this journey of becoming visible and finding our self-expression. Share your stories, your fears, your dreams in the comments with me – and together, let's take the invisibility cloak off.

Because everyone’s voice matters and needs to be heard!

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Toxic positivity leads to gaslighting

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When you put yourself into someone else’s shoes too much!