‘What do you mean, you feel invisible. Get a grip!’
Not feeling heard or seen by others is one of the most excruciating feelings on earth. Don’t you think? It’s soul crushing! More so it is a tabu subject!
I remember vividly, when I was developing my first solo show called ‘Circus of Emotions’. I did one improvisation, which was all about invisibility. Literally!
I was walking through a crowd of people and no one noticed me. Finally I got up on a pedestal to hold a speech. But no one reacted. It was, as if I was a ghost. I jumped down from the pedestal, stopping people in a frenzy, shouting:
‘Hello, can you hear me? Anyone!’
Silence. There was only the echo of stillness in my ears and emptiness all around me.
Some improvisations I never forget! This is one of them.
A friend of mine posted on Facebook yesterday, that he at the moment feels invisible to other people. I thought to voice his feelings was such a brave move! He recently lost his wife to cancer. He told me, the last time he felt invisible was after his divorce.
I feel invisible, when I for example write a blog post and after I’ve published it, it seems to disappear in the eternal internet ether. Like a black hole. If no one commented I’ll never know, if it made an impact on someone else’s life.
I want to matter. Everyone does!
So, do you have a place in your life where you feel truly seen and heard the way you are with all your imperfections?
For me, feeling seen means to be able to express myself fully. Showing vulnerability without being judged. Being able to say, that I feel sad and drepressed today for example. If the witness is judgemental I most likely end up in a shame drama. It’s like a dog gone mad, barking at me constantly.
So, let me tell you, the one place where I truly feel visible is our new theatre company ‘No Ordinary Theatre’.
It’s like a sacred, safe space, where everybody is welcomed the way they are. We are all very different from one another. Still, the promise to show up fully connects us on a deeper level.
Each rehearsal we start with sitting in a circle on the floor and ‘checking in’. Which means, everyone gets to say how they feel at the moment. ‘I feel so anxious today, because I hate parking in this tight place.’ (That was one of my dramas…) There’s no discussion, only listening. Which is why, it is so healing I believe. The check-in circle is our preparation for play as well.
Afterwards we either do group improvisations or solos. After each play we give feedback. We agreed to always be encouraging. We look for what we really liked, instead of critisising relentlessly.
‘I loved that delicate movement with your hands. I want to see more of it.’
This way each performer can feel save, expressing him- or herself fully! I am absolutely loving it. I enjoy watching the others play as much as acting on stage myself.
If it was up to me, I would be doing this every day. I hope it’ll come true soon! 🙂
It’s all I want to do!
Play, improvise, perform, act!
Play, improvise, perform, act!
It makes me feel so alive! Everything is possible. You can be angry and funny at the same time. I am very good at it. 🙂
Wouldn’t it be wonderful if there were more places in society, where we can express ourselves freely, being who we truly are?
Most of the times, I feel I have to fake, that everything is fine with me, when it’s not. Who wants to hear the real story?
I often ask myself where do all the emotions go? Underground, where the fester and sometimes turn against us in form of illnesses. I really believe, that my health issues at least in part are linked to that.
In my opinion, theatre, as well as film are promoting emotional freedom! Audience and players are going on a journey together and it can be cathartic. This is one of the few places, where people still allow themselves to feel. Cry, if the story is sad etc.
‘No Ordinary Theatre’ is devoted to transformative play.
We improvise dramas immediately, while being entertaining and funny at the same time.
Rapunzel gets reeinvted. The prince can’t be bothered to climb up the tower and when he finally does, he’s shocked to find out it’s his own mother …
An innocent rabbit gets shot. You name it.
There are so many more weird, absurd things happening on stage.
As an audience you’ re definitely in for a surprise all the way long.
Monday the 29th of May in the evening No Ordinary Theatre has its first inofficial performance in Marazion, Church Hall. Each of us can invite 4 friends.
So, if you are a friend of mine and live close by, let me know and I put you on the list.
In case you don’t live close by, but you feel you have an issue with invisiblity, feel free to contact me. I offer free taster coaching sessions.
Look for more information on my Be Creative page. I’m happy to be your witness to feel seen again. 🙂